Witch Belle

 What is a "mental breakdown"?      Let's start with the Dictionary. Merriam-Webster does not have a definition for it but does have one for "nervous breakdown", which other sites say are interchangeable terms. So Webster describes it as "an attack of mental or emotional disorder especially when of sufficient severity to require hospitalization." Mine is bad but thank goodness it is not to that extent.      Web MD describes a mental breakdown as "a term that describes a period of extreme mental or emotional stress. The stress is so great that the person is unable to perform normal day-to-day activities." It continues on to include examples of some things that would cause it, in my case it would be continuous stress from work and financial problems. Probably more than that for me but I'm in no way a doctor of any kind to understand them all.       A clinical psychologist, Psy D Sabrina Romanoff, explained it "is a peri...

    The year has started out just like any other, stuff goes wrong. For nearly all of January I was battling a severe kidney infection that had inflamed all of my organs on my left side of my body. After two ER visits, two CT scans, strong antibiotics, multiple tests and Urologist visits I have recovered from the worst of it. Still currently doing home physical therapy to restrengthen up my psuas muscle (connects the hip to the lower back) which was agitated so bad from the infection that it now makes pain in my lower ribs on that side. Doctors were perplexed how I acquired such an infection and why none of my tests showed an infection, only the CT scans did. Further more my current job has been letting many people go, so the stress of possibly loosing my job and insurance is very strong right now.     Now that you are all caught up, that brings me to my bad anxiety attack of yesterday and panic attack today. Yesterday was the first day after another wave o...

 August 2, 2022     Woke a bit unmotivated and tired. Went through my normal routine with making hot tea and eating cereal dry. Anxiety started creeping in a bit differently then normal. Should have called in but I kept talking myself out of it. So I blasted my vape a few times (CBD) and forced myself to drive to work despite my mind and body panicking. I was asked by multiple people if I was alright, cause they know me wearing a scarf on my head means bad anxiety. But I didn't know what was wrong. It's as if my body went into Fight/Flight/Hide and my mind chose HIDE. But I didn't know what from. The ghosts and Fae just went about like normal but didn't interact with me. Like they could sense it.     The panic would get a little worse before calming slightly and repeating the process even worse. I went to first break on time and sat away from the others slightly. Frantically truing to get spoonfuls of peanut butter in my as salt and sugar, and puffing ...